An Overview of My Life
Akshey Jawa
Travelling to Mars 🚀 || IIITH + MIT Manipal || Spirituality + Academics for Children & Youth | Technology | Rural work | Design & UI/UX | SpiritualityOnMars.com
Table of Contents
- my childhood (hisar)
- schooling
- class 11 & 12 in chandigarh [2001-2003]
- got into spirituality in 2003
- academic studies before joining college in 2003
- engineering college - manipal institute of technology, karnataka [2003-07]
- IIIT hyderabad (masters) [2007-2016]
- first company - crypsis technologies, hyderabad [2011-2014]
- spiritual life during these years
- a shift towards "how to live" education of children & youth, hyderabad [2014-2015]
- yogananda's ashram & school, ranchi [2015-16]
- after the ashram, in hyderabad & hisar [2016-17]
- yogananda parenting, gurgaon (remote) [2017]
- NIIT, gurgaon [2019-20]
- klearnow, hisar (remote) [2020-22]
- spirituality on mars [2022 onwards]
I was born on May 4, 1986, in Hisar, Haryana, India, which is about 180 km from New Delhi. I spent many years of my life in Hisar.
My professional education is in Computer Science, but I have self-studied and worked in various other fields.
I have a deep interest in spirituality. Paramahansa Yogananda's books "Autobiography of a Yogi" and "The Divine Romance" changed my life when I was in Class 12, in 2003. I was 17 years old then.
Now, in 2024, I live in Chandigarh. I work on 'Spirituality on Mars'. I am single (unmarried).
MY CHILDHOOD (HISAR)
I lived with my parents in Hisar till Class 10. Both my parents were strict. I was playful but timid. I had a lot of fun with many friends, some of whom I still meet occasionally.
My mother has always been a housewife and was the dominant personality in the house.
I did not have a typical emotional bond with my parents. My friction with my mother was especially strong. My childhood was quite difficult.
Parents & Family (Hisar)
My father is a doctor (paediatrician). Since I was a few years old, he has run a popular children’s hospital in Hisar. Becoming a follower of Yogananda around 1998 changed his life. Since we both are deeply attached to Paramahansa Yogananda, my father and I have a deep understanding between us. I always feel a deep respect towards him, especially because I feel he is such a good disciple of Yogananda. Following a spiritual giant for so many-many years naturally cultivated deep wisdom in him.
The hospital and our house share the same premises. Currently, there are two doctors along with my father in the hospital.
My mother is involved in the administration of the hospital. She generally works from home and also manages household work. Our house is the control center for many of the hospital activities.
My sister, a paedodontist, lives with her family in New Delhi. She is four years younger than me and has a four-year-old son.
SCHOOLING
Army Public School, Hisar - Classes 1 to 8 [1991-1999]
From Class 1 to 8, I attended Army Public School, Hisar. The school was in the Army Cantonment. My father was never associated with the army, but civilians could also join the school. I liked the school.
Siddharth and Mahak were my close friends. They were sons of friends of my parents. They were in the same class as me. We used to go to school together, where we played together. In the evenings, at home and in parks, we used to play together and sometimes joined other friends (Daksh and others). We mostly played cricket, but on some occasions, we played football, table tennis, badminton, etc. Life with friends was quite pleasant. I spent a lot of time playing outdoors or with video games.
Also, I played a lot with the children of my neighbours. I have many cherished memories of that time. At home, I used to have frequent fights with my sister, but we played as well.
During this time, we lived in a rented house. Around Class 7, we moved to a new house in Sector 13 (the one shown in the previous section). There were very few children around, so outdoor playing opportunities were limited.
Father started following Yogananda
When I was in Class 8, my father read Paramahansa Yogananda's "Autobiography of a Yogi" and became a Kriya Yoga meditation practitioner. His life changed and he became a much nicer person. His temper and strictness reduced greatly. He was a new person — still somewhat strict but very wisdom-guided and just. He often pushed us to develop an interest in spirituality. I was not interested! Neither were my mother or sister.
He used to tell me stories from the "Autobiography of a Yogi" every morning.
He started a group meditation hall in our house around 2001-02. Yogananda devotees still gather there to practice meditation and devotional activities in a group.
Campus School, Hisar - Classes 8 to 10 [1999-2001]
From Class 8 to 10, I attended this school. It was like a regular CBSE school. I liked my previous school more.
Got a New Computer
In Class 8, we got a new computer at home, and I became very fond of it. I didn't learn programming until college, but I started learning about the Windows OS, MS Office, and the basics of computer hardware. I used to tinker a lot and played many computer games. This sparked a desire in me to become a computer engineer.
CLASS 11 & 12 IN CHANDIGARH [2001-2003]
I lived and studied for these two years in Chandigarh while preparing for competitive exams like IIT-JEE. Till 10th class, for most subjects, education was mainly focused on rote learning. Now, I was attending Physics, Maths, and Chemistry classes taught by IITian teachers. Education became more logical. I liked Physics, but my overall interest in studies was just average.
I lived alone in an individual apartment and used to go to distant classes mostly by bicycle. I was cycling a lot - around 12 km daily during Class 11. I really liked Chandigarh.
I used to visit Hisar for a few days every two to three months.
GOT INTO SPIRITUALITY IN 2003
My father was already a meditator and a disciple of Paramahansa Yogananda. He encouraged and sometimes pushed the rest of the family to meditate. But no one was very interested.
Around January 2003, during Class 12, while I lived in Chandigarh, I picked up a self-help book from a bookstore, which I liked very much. It was "The Be Happy Attitudes" by Robert H. Schuller. I had never read books in this category before. I thought, if this is such a good book, then "Autobiography of a Yogi" by Paramahansa Yogananda, which my father often talked about, must also be good because it also talks about changing one's life. When I read it, it opened my eyes. It gave me a glimpse of realities beyond what we experience in day-to-day life. I liked it!
The book "The Divine Romance" by Paramahansa Yogananda had a life-changing influence on me. It became my favourite book. It contains many of Yogananda's talks on Divine Love, Reincarnation, Mind, Purpose of Life, and other topics. What I read was not mere printed words. They had a life; they were living words. It was as if Yogananda was still living invisibly in those words and entering into my being through them. The first chapter on 'Divine Love' had the deepest impact on me. I was sitting in the basement of my house in Hisar and kept weeping and weeping while reading this book. I had never read anything like this before. From it, I understood that what I had been seeking all my life actually existed, and I could finally find it. It gave me new hope!
As many years have passed since then, I have realised the truth of the first chapter. It did not give false hope. The unconditional love that it promised actually exists in spirituality!
All Yogananda disciples learn from his writings. They are discouraged from becoming teachers. Therefore, my father was never my spiritual teacher. He was more like a mentor. And he set a good example of how a Yogananda disciple should be. But most of the time, I was living in a different city and dealing with my own problems. In the initial years, he used to encourage and remind me to meditate, but once I took Kriya initiation in 2014, he mostly never asked me again. I was quite driven myself.
Who is Yogananda? What is Kriya Yoga?
Academic Studies Before Joining College in 2003
In those days, except for the IITs and a few other colleges, all engineering admissions were through a common exam called AIEEE.
AIEEE was in May 2003, and I did very badly in it. I think the results also came out in May itself.
After studying under IITian teachers in Chandigarh, my mind was focused entirely on IITs. I thought I would take a year off after Class 12 and prepare again to clear the IIT entrance exam. My parents really wanted me to take admission somewhere that same year. They did not want me to lose one year.
My friend's mother had told us about Manipal University's exam, and my parents had a good impression of it, so it was decided that I would sit for that exam. It was about two months later.
I was in the mood to take the year off unless I got admitted somewhere. Since there was no other option, my parents had also agreed to it.
Bad results in AIEEE had quite an impact on me. I thought I would study seriously during the gap year. It was decided that I would stay in Hisar and join coaching classes there.
Spiritually, those were good times. I used to enjoy listening to YSS bhajans a lot.
Also, I started getting a lot of interest in studies for the first time in my life.
I studied Physics with great dedication. I was studying a lot. My father was pleasantly surprised.
I was doing well in Maths, but my Chemistry was very weak.
About two months passed by, and the time for the Manipal exam came. I took the exam and felt I did fine.
I got a rank of 1690. My father went for counselling with Computer Science (CS) and Information Technology (IT) as preferences. He got none, but while leaving counselling, he wrote my name on the waiting list. If a seat got vacant, students from the waiting list were to be called. He had no hope that my turn would come.
When he returned home, he told me that I did not get a seat.
I was happy with my studies and was studying well. All exams were over, and it was clear that I would take the year off to prepare for engineering entrance exams.
One day, I was attending a coaching class. Both my parents came and called me out of the class. They had received a letter from Manipal University informing them that I had received admission (because of the waitlist).
Hurriedly, my mother and I went to Manipal! I was among the last students in that batch of Manipal to get admitted. It was a late admission, but it was solely on merit. It was not a "paid seat."
ENGINEERING COLLEGE - MANIPAL INSTITUTE OF TECHNOLOGY, KARNATAKA [2003-07]
BE, Information Technology, www.manipal.edu
Manipal Institute of Technology (MIT) is among the best private engineering colleges in India. It is an institute with over 60 years of history and is part of Manipal University, Karnataka.
Microsoft's CEO, Satya Nadella, also completed his engineering degree in Electronics at the same institute.
I Got Interested in Programming & Computer Science
During my four years of engineering education, I became deeply interested in programming. In the thought world, Dennis Ritchie (creator of the C programming language) & Kernighan were my best friends. I spent all my time immersed in C++, TCP/IP, Networking, 8086 & Assembly, Linux scripting, Compiler's frontend (Lex/Yacc), 8051 Microcontroller, Logic Design, Java Core, and everything related to programming. I did programming almost all the time. I also studied other areas, like DS, Algorithms, OS, DBMS, Cryptography, and a few others, but with a less intensity.
I did not just love programming, I breathed programming. My dream was to work on the tough problems of Computer Science. Getting into an IIT/IIITH was something beyond my imagination. On one side, I wanted more programming; on the other side, I was too much tired of programming madness. Something deep in my consciousness used to shout in pain because it yearned to get rid of this addictive programming and live a spiritual life, which I had desired since first reading Yogananda's books, as much as a fish wants water.
This picture is a bit awkward because of my posture, but it's the only picture I have with my dearest friend from Manipal: Pritish. He was among the most simple, down-to-earth, and quiet people I have known.
During Holidays
We used to have 1.5 to 2 months of holidays between every two semesters. I looked forward to returning to Hisar to gain spiritual peace & motivation from my father's presence and the group meditations at home. At home, I spent a lot of time programming, and on occasions, I attended the group meditations & gained something valuable from them.
Starting from the first or second semester holidays, my relationship with my mother had turned very painful and hostile. During holidays, our communication was sometimes normal and sometimes it was not. Phone conversations during the semester used to be okay. In the holidays of later semesters, things were less painful.
Spirituality
I could not practice much spirituality during these four years in college, nor read anything spiritual. During my first few weeks in Manipal, I tried to hold on to the peace and serenity that I had felt just before coming to Manipal, but I couldn't. I felt my earth move beneath me. It was very tough, but I could not do anything about it. In the years that followed, on rare occasions, Ifelt a deep longing towards spirituality, but I was too occupied with programming and the non-spiritual environment around me.
Near the end of the course, I started to feel partially withdrawn from programming, making room for spirituality. That transition led me to experience a deeper spiritual peace and happiness later at IIIT.
At the end of the Manipal phase
During the last few semesters, I had started losing focus on programming & everything else because of some issues that were happening in life, and I had started going into spirituality. I got placed in Wipro, but the programmer in me was looking for something better. I got a chance to do last semester 6 months project in IIITH. I appeared for IIIT's entrance exam and got admission to their Master's program.
IIIT HYDERABAD (MASTERS) [2007-2016]
MS in Computer Science by Research, www.iiit.ac.in
IIIT-HYDERABAD is among the top tech institutes in India and is known to be better than most IITs for its focus on Computer Science Education, Research, Computer Programming culture & Startups.
IIIT phase happened to be a spiritual phase in my life. I underwent a tremendous change and felt as if God decided to cut off my attachment to Programming. For me, Spirituality, Design, Research, Linux and other things were the major highlights of this phase. Programming was still going on, but with much less vigour than in Manipal.
The tremendous Spiritual changes, experiences, and difficulties I went through during the initial months & rest of the years led me to believe that it was a big spiritual leap in my life. Handling spirituality and the karma kept me busier than the whole course itself.
IIIT gave a soothing, simple, and home-like environment, conducive to spirituality. True spiritual experiences are difficult to discuss with anyone so I mostly kept them to myself.
I was not involved in any spiritual initiatives at IIIT, like Jeevan Vidya and others, but I have always appreciated them.
I worked on a Linux cluster to parallelise a Simulation engine and published a research paper in a reputed peer-reviewed journal.
I worked on a Nokia-funded EdTech product for an upcoming Linux-based Nokia handhelds in those pre-iPhone days. A paper on that was accepted at NEW2AN International Conference in Russia & the same was also presented in a Nokia Workshop in Bangalore.
While studying the "Usability Engineering" subject, I got deeply interested in the field of UX Design. "Design of Everyday Things" by Don Norman, a classic on UX, was the biggest trigger. After that I studied more on UX, Visual Design, CSS, Web Design, and principles & theories of design, colors, typography, and aesthetics.
While in IIIT or Crypsis, I visited home quite less, so interaction with my parents was less. Now, the atmosphere at home was better than before. I did not share a bond with my mother, but I had less friction with her now. But from time to time, I was dealing with my own problems. I had become very sensitive.
Spiritual Books I Read in IIIT
I read an excellent book on Sri Ramakrishna's life, out of interest. It was "Sri Ramakrishna and his Divine Play". It was a very thick book.
But the books by Yogananda and his disciples are the ones that always help me the most. The book "God alone" was the most helpful and inspiring. Along with Divine Romance, it is among my favourites for my own personal spiritual journey.
FIRST COMPANY - CRYPSIS TECHNOLOGIES, HYDERABAD [2011-2014]
Crypsis, now named Devathon, was primarily a services-based web development startup in Hyderabad, back then. It was founded by 2 BTech passouts of IIITH. When I joined, it was already in a startup incubator at IIITH since one year and had a strength of around 10 employees. After a year they moved out of the incubator and got a new building in Jubilee Hills (Hyderabad).
Some of the prominent projects I was part of were:
CHECKINTONIGHT - I see CheckInTonight as one of my star projects primarily because of my work in the area of UX Design: Creation of Low Fidelity Wireframes, Creativity, and CSS design. Read more
BOOKISH - Bookish was a content discovery and e-commerce platform devoted to books. It was a joint venture backed by three of the big six publishing companies: Hachette Book Group, Penguin Group (USA) and Simon & Schuster. I was completely into frontend and was trying to implement the best of what I had learnt about CSS so far - OOCSS, CSS3, Design Style Guides, etc. Read more
TechCrunch blog: Zola Books Snaps Up Bookish
NORTHSTAR - There was this chain of restaurants in the US. They wanted us to develop a web platform that could facilitate table booking, the admin side and other use cases. I developed some impressive wireframes for the project and worked on the JavaScript for this project. Read more
I also worked on other projects, which were primarily on CSS.
I did an extensive self-study on CSS and CSS handling methodologies - OOCSS, SMACSS, etc. I took an interest in web-page performance - Steve Sounder's work and webpage performance tools. I studied a lot about design.
I took at least about 50-60 Tech and some QA interviews while working in Crypsis. I also got an opportunity to give a 2-day (16 hours) HTML5/CSS3/JS training to employees of Cognizant Technology Solutions, Chennai.
Books I read during the Crypsis phase
Book: CSS Mastery - Anny Budd
Book: Responsive Web Design - Ethan Marcotte
Book: HTML5 for Web Designers - Jeremy Keith & Rachel Andrew
Book: CSS3 for Web Designers - Dan Cederholm
Read this blog: Smashing Magazine
SPIRITUAL LIFE DURING THESE YEARS
Spiritual books I read during this phase
God talks with Arjuna - Paramahansa Yogananda: This book by Yogananda affected me deeply. I found it to be a difficult book. I used to read only a few pages at a time. Among other things, it explained very logically how the creation is constructed and how the world holds us with delusive forces. Just by understanding how the world is constructed to fool us, some of my deep desires died away. I read several major portions of this book.
Story of a soul - St. Therese of Lisieux: This book too had a deep effect on me. What touched me most was the humility of this saint. I listened to the audiobook many times. I still do sometimes when I need humility and devotion.
God lived with them - Swami Chetananda: This book affected me deeply. It is about 16 monastic disciples of Sri Ramakrishna - Swami Vivekananda, Swami Brahmananda, Latu Maharaj, Premananda, and others. It has many life stories on their times with their Guru - Sri Ramakrishna. It is full of Guru-bhakti, renunciation, courage, meditation, humility, and other divine thoughts.
I read many other writings of Yogananda
Took Kriya Initiation [2014]
Kriya Yoga path, formulated by Paramahansa Yogananda, is a spiritual path that focuses on Kriya Yoga Meditation and Devotion. I was already following this path but it drew my attention more strongly during this phase. I got initiated into Kriya Yoga on 6th Jan, 2014 and started practising meditation regularly. Even before this phase, my Guru Paramahansa Yoganandaji was everything to me.
Why did I transition from Tech/IT work to Education & Spiritual work?
I was quite happy in Crypsis. But during the last few months in Crypsis, I started feeling a strange disinterest in work. Some experiences pushed me to take a serious interest in opening a "How to Live" school, about which my Guru Yogananda often talked. This was a school where true spirituality and academics could be taught together. Thinking about school was strange because I never had any special interest in children or their education.
In my mind, I used to see myself speaking in front of many. I thought it was my ego suggesting me to teach others. I was strongly rejecting it. I knew clearly that my Guru and his chief disciple, Daya ma, had told that the desire to teach spirituality to others is a pitfall. One should try only to change oneself. The desire to teach others spirituality brings ego and pride. Daya ma's words used to echo in my mind strongly.
While I was still resisting the idea of the school, one day I had an important & strange divine dream. I saw myself in a place well known to me in Hyderabad. A bomb blast happened there. I was at a safe distance, but I saw some dear young boys getting brutally injured. I saw them with limbs broken and blood was coming out. I woke up with the words - "So much suffering! So much suffering!" That dream was very impressive. Generally, I forget dreams, but this one was very clear and I still remember it. Yoganandaji had told in the teachings that generally dreams originate from the subconscious mind, so most dreams do not need to be given importance. But this one had all the signs of a divine dream. I felt that the divine was trying to convey to me the sorrow of the suffering world and how badly the world needs the sorrow-freeing spirituality. Those who understand spirituality deeply would know that sorrow can be removed at a deep level only through spirituality. Of course, providing health care and education to poor also helps but spirituality removes selfishness from human hearts, spreads positivity, encourages sharing and most importantly, improves karma. All this leads to happier people and less pain. Outer fixes like education of the poor also help, but only like a symptomatic relief, like what is given by Paracetamol during fever. The infection does not go away with that.
A few other smaller events also happened, which I can't remember now clearly, but they also pushed me towards the school idea.
With these thoughts going through my mind, I reluctantly accepted the thought of school.
I studied Yogananda's thoughts on education. We all learn by example. So, I also tried to find and study other schools doing similar things as Yogananda's vision. At that time, I did not know more than one or two such schools.
I helped Crypsis in finding a replacement for me and eventually left from there. It was nice working there. I still feel connected to them.
How to Live schools & Yogananda's amrit
To a person not acquainted with Yogananda's teachings, the term "How to Live" schools may mean those schools where life skills are taught along with academics. One may think that because it is Yogananda's term, life skills may also include spirituality, among other things.
But Yogananda's vision of these schools was more spiritual. Spirituality was of primary importance in his schools.
When I think about "How to live" schools, it is very clear to me. The school should offer the same life-giving divine amrit that I received from Yogananda's teachings and his organisation, YSS. That amrit alone can remove suffering and contains the love and purity that fulfill a soul.
I have no interest or aptitude of running a school or a business for conventional reasons. I am not doing this work for my interests. I know that if it is truly God's will, everything will work out - and almost every day, I see His will working.
(In the modern world, self-confidence is given a lot of importance, but in spirituality, confidence in God is of higher importance. Almost all the great spiritual works that have ever been done have been done with this confidence in God's ability to do things. There is a spiritual power that can work through people to do great spiritual work.)
Rather than working with children, it would have been more natural for me to take up a job somewhere, as I was doing earlier, or to engage in simple work at one of my Guru's simple ashrams, while focusing on my inner life.
I want to do this work not because of my interests but for the little sacred souls and the divine will. That divinity and purity are worth spending one's life for.
The world is becoming increasingly complex. Children need protection from harmful influences, as well as guidance in character development, and support in cultivating all aspects of life—physical, mental, social, and spiritual. Above all, they need the divine amrit of God's love, peace, goodness, and strength in their hearts, minds, and souls.
My deep interest in reading books on Saints
Yogananda has written clearly in his writings: "After I met my Guru, I neither sought nor accepted counsel from anyone else, nor did I practice any other teachings. The spiritual force comes from single-hearted dedication to one path. Anything less is a travesty of love and loyalty."
But during this Crypsis phase, I read a lot about Sri Ramakrishna and a little about Vivekananda too. I used to wonder why I was so drawn to their books. Sitting in front of Yoganandaji's picture, looking into his eyes, I used to say in my mind - "You always surprise me, much beyond my ability to adjust. Now, please do not tell me that Sri Ramakrishna is my Guru." I had given my heart and life to Yoganandaji.
For a few days, I kept thinking that thought. One day when I again thought the same thought, a new thought came in my mind - "With whom did I have personal spiritual experiences?" The answer was very clear to me. I had so many loving spiritual experiences with my own beloved Guru who is the heart of all hearts. With Sri Ramakrishna, I had no spiritual experience (even though I know that he too is very great). I just felt inspired by his life and the life of his disciples.
Personal devotional experiences with my Guru meant a lot more at a deeper level. His pictures, his eyes, and his writings affected me at the most fundamental level. He held me from within. He pulled me from within. He had strong invisible control over me. Many times his invisible force had drifted my life in different directions. Of course, karma also has a major role to play.
This thought on personal experiences helped me see things from a different perspective, and I never had that doubt again. It made me feel safe reading books other than those of my Guru. Devotees often remarked that I should not be reading other writings than those of the Guru (because it dilutes the spiritual focus and diverts our spiritual interest in different directions). But from inside, I felt drawn to these books for good reasons.
Meditation gave me extreme trouble. I mean I had no success in that (but I did it regularly as Yogananda wanted His disciples to do).
Whenever I wanted to rekindle my desire for God, I looked for a new book on a true saint. Books helped to rekindle my desire for God and to continue on Yogananda's path even against difficulties. In other words, it was these great divine books that acted like the candles in God's hands. They brought light in times of difficulties. I found rest in them. With their help, I could carry on the journey on the rough terrain. I hardly ever read the teachings of anyone, except that of Yogananda. In fact, I always saw clearly that I was driven to read the life stories of saints, but I could not read their teachings. My mind could not read their teachings. I gained from their life stories. But it is true that while reading life stories I do get some idea of their teachings also.
One of the first books I read outside Yogananda's books was "Ramakrishna & His Divine Play". It is a 1000+ page book. I started from the beginning, read page by page. I was in a very joyful state during that phase (even before reading that book). I felt even more bliss by reading that book. After weeks and perhaps months, I reached the middle of the book. The book starts with Sri Ramakrishna as a baby (or even before that), how he grew up, how he became a priest in Kali temple, passed through his sadhana phase, and how he attained many visions of Ma Kali.
At this point in the story, he used to go to the roof of his house and call upon his future devotees in a loud voice- "Come to me! I am waiting for you!" And the devotees started coming one by one (they may be responding to his strong vibratory calls to their souls). At this point in the book reading process, I was anticipating more joy in reading the book further. I wanted to read the rest of the pages, but I could not. I tried hard, but I could not read. My mind could not focus on that. I was enjoying the reading so much that I wanted to read more. After many days of trials, I gave up. I did not know why I could not read further, but I had to give up. From this point on in the book, he interacted regularly with his disciples, who later became spiritual giants - Vivekananda, Brahmananda, and others. So, in the subsequent pages, the teachings of Sri Ramakrishna were shared.
That was probably my first book outside Yogananda & his disciples.
Over the next few years, after reading many great books, I realized, I had never read any book on the "teachings" of any saint other than Yogananda. I read life stories, they always helped me in my own spiritual journey but I could not read or understand any other teachings. I have tried to understand the teachings of a number of saints (Vivekananda, Sri Ramakrishna, Sri Aurobindo, Krishnamurthi, and others), sometimes to know about them and sometimes to know about their school philosophy, but I never understood much. But I always felt pushed to read their life stories. Their life stories give me life to walk further on Yogananda's path.
Whenever I told any Yogananda devotees close to me (like my father) about any non-Yogananda book, they often dissuaded me from reading them. I was quite sensitive, so it used to pinch me and I used to think a lot about my habit of reading these books. A new realization came to me that I was reading them because I needed to teach and so these stories would help. (I guess this thought came sometime after I came to know that I had to work on "How to live" schools.)
I read a lot about Sri Ramakrishna and His disciples. Now in 2025, generally, I do not feel pulled to those writings.
To sum up, what inspired me in the biographies of Sri Ramakrishna's disciples and in Sri Ramakrishna's own life, can be put in a few words:
- Intense longing for God-realization
- Severe detachment
- Lots of stories of saints, full of Devotion, Guru-bhakti, and some of them are very sweet and funny.
I have given a long explanation. Let me reshare what Yogananda said on this topic for all His disciples:
"After I met my Guru, I neither sought nor accepted counsel from anyone else, nor did I practice any other teachings. The spiritual force comes from single-hearted dedication to one path. Anything less is a travesty of love and loyalty."
In fact, Vivekananda also said something similar. After Sri Ramakrishna's passing, he used to roam across India. At one time he met a saint who impressed him very much. That was Pavhari baba. Vivekananda thought of taking initiation from him. But then Vivekananda saw Sri Ramakrishna's face in a vision daily for 21 days. Vivekananda understood that he should not be taking initiation because he had a Guru.
Also, I read books and listened to lectures of Ram Dass, Joel Osteen, Eknath Easwaran and others. I think my ways of talking about spirituality will have many features from Ram Dass and Joel Osteen. They both are fun, entertaining, and down-to-earth.
I must also mention that the general guidance of Yogananda on this topic is that one should not be reading too much outside the path, but at the same time, he recommended reading the lives of saints. He himself read a few.
In fact, I heard about some of my favourite spiritual books for the first time through YSS monks. The book "God lived with them" was recommended by a YSS monk. The book "Saints that moved the world" was recommended in the YSS book "God Alone".
Desire for monastic life
Somewhere during the years 2010-2014, I had developed a strong desire for monastic life. But I clearly knew that monastic life was not for me. I remember, somewhere around 2011-2012 I mentioned this to a senior YSS monk, not with the intention of applying for it but I mentioned it by chance during a conversation.
Around 2012-13, I was reading a lot on Ramakrishna and His disciples and especially Vivekananda. That really flamed the desire. That saffron colour used to intrigue me a lot. If I just saw the saffron colour in a picture or a movie, I used to feel uplifted and inspired. But I knew that there were many obstacles in my life that wouldn't let me become one. Most importantly, I knew intutitively that monastic life was not for me. There were no doubts about it. Nevertheless, that desire used to pull me.
Later, when I was in the ashram, I was surrounded by monks. I think one of the kind monks wanted to know my intentions. Monastics are generally not allowed to ask someone about joining as a monk. In fact they always discourage. I think they do that because monastic life is tough and they do not want to push anyone to join it, unless they themselves are deeply interested.
So this monk started telling me that I should marry. He started telling me about devotee girls (and their parents) who wanted to marry a devotee. He started telling me that they were good devotees. I had already faced pressure from my mother to get married. I told Swamiji that I told Guruji in prayers that I do not want to marry for the next many years. It had so happened that around 2013-2014, my mother used to push me a lot about marriage. I had read a lot about Sri Ramakrishna. He used to say that just like a wrestler enters into the arena after putting a lot of oil on his body, to make sure that the opponent is not able to grab him, same way, before entering into the world one should apply the oil of vairagya (detachment) so that all kinds of worldliness does not get hold of the devotee after marriage. That quote really inspired me. I had prayed to God to keep me away from marriage for many years so that I could gain detachment.
In day-to-day life in the ashram, everyone around me was talking about entering into monastic life. All the young boys of my age (or younger) who were staying in the ashram had applied for monastic life. I was asked this question many times- "Don't you also want to become a monk?" I generally said, "I think Guruji wants me to work in school, that is why he brought me here." That was true, but there was more to it, but I did not share all my thoughts with the boys.
But my desire for monastic life was great. I really used to enjoy stories about the famous YSS monks. My roommate in the ashram used to tell me about Swami Bhavanandaji, Nirvananandaji and others. I heard them with great interest. Interest in the monastic life was there even though I knew I won't be becoming one.
I remember, sometimes in the ashram, some people from outside used to come to the ashram for a week or so. Some of them had been married for about 2-3 years. If they seemed good devotees, I sometimes asked them out of curiosity & friendship, "Why did you not become a monk?" :).
I assume they might have told this to some monks.
One day I was going somewhere with 2 monks. I take monks very seriously. If they ask something, it is a very big thing. I have been in the ashram for a long time now. They asked me the same question, but a little indirectly. I told them that I did have a strong desire to become a monk but that was not Guruji's wish for my life. Back then, I had no idea that I would be doing the work I do now. It was unthinkable. I felt very small & imperfect on the spiritual path. But I knew that monastic life was not for me. But I must say, when you are in the ashram, surrounded by monks and others who want to become monks, it becomes very easy and tempting to apply for monastic life. But I never applied. I could see that there were many different types of karmas in my life, which were big obstacles. Also, intuitively, I knew clearly that monastic life was not for me.
As years passed by, I saw many boys I knew in the ashram become monks and make progress. I used to feel a little sad for myself because I could not be like them.
But over the years, probably since 2024, I started feeling great love for people. I started feeling that many-many people were included in this great love of God getting expressed through me. I felt this was very satisfying to my spiritual side. I felt that my life was also dedicated to God so I felt satisfied. So I do not feel a strong desire for monastic life as I used to feel earlier.
But I have great reverence for monastic life. It gives single-pointedness to one's spiritual longing. Monks leave a great many things that we can usually get attached to. They cut off all the main attachments to life. They live with yogis and saints and dedicate their whole life for pure and spiritual causes while living in guidance and training under senior and realised renunciants. They live on a small sum of money and dedicate their lives to God and spiritual progress, which brings lasting joy and happiness. The stories I hear about senior monks and nuns are usually about their deep inner joy and love for the Guru and for the people of the world. People say that as soon as they come in the presence of these monastics, they feel joy and happiness because the invisible vibrations of the monastics are like that. So, indeed, monastic life is worth it. The goal is happiness, both for monastics and for people in the world. We look for it in worldly things, they look for it in inner realisation, and they often find it! :)
There is a quote: "Wisdom says no one belongs to me, Love says everyone belongs to me." Nowadays, wherever I go, I feel that an invisible thread of divine love is sewn around me and many people are included in this love.
Struggles with Meditation
Meditation has always given me extreme trouble. I mean I had no success in that (but I did it regularly as Yogananda wanted His disciples to do). Even to this day (Apr 2025), it is difficult.
When I had first meditated in Class 12, after reading the Autobiography of a Yogi, I was a normal calm individual. I was already a YSS lesson member. I frequently tried to meditate but I could not focus.
In college, as my interest in studies & programming grew, I became more restless. Meditation became even more difficult. During holidays, I used to visit home and attend group meditations. Meditation was nearly impossible even then. I was not a regular meditator back then.
In IIIT, I used to be calm the majority of the time, but I still could not practise the meditation techniques.
As years passed, my levels of calmness were relatively normal and I used to wonder why is meditation still unusually difficult? I knew meditation would have helped me very much.
On rare occasions, I used to have spiritual experiences. They used to bring peace, sometimes for many months, but meditation techniques did not.
When I was in the ashram, I took counselling from a few senior monastics, but nothing worked.
Many devotees face such periods of time when they find meditation to be dry and difficult. In my case, this period became very long. I kept on meditating, like a ritual, not because I liked it, but because I was supposed to do it as per the sacred pledge I had taken during Kriya initiation. The pledge became the backbone of my life.
Daily meditation habit, even though it was not giving any visible results, was a thin, invisible bond between me and my Guru. I felt that as long as I continued to give time to those very imperfect meditations, I was invisibly connected to my Guru. I went through all kinds of hammering difficulties in regard to meditation, but I somehow managed to continue.
Such phases when meditation does not work are not so uncommon on the spiritual path.
Daya ma said...
...what is the best way to combat spiritual dryness in one's meditations? One thing... refusing to give up. That's the best way to combat it.
Swami Anandamoy said...
Swami Anandamoy was a prominent direct disciple of Yogananda. He has said in an audio talk:
If the devotee would but realize at this time [of spiritual dryness] that he is merely passing through a phase that every soul who ever found God passed through, and that all he needs to do is continue his meditations even if he doesn't get any tangible results. That's the important point.
Dry spells may be coming, sometimes due to a karmic condition, sometimes directly as a test from God.
When you make an ocean trip, the boat is on the ocean, and all you see is water, sky, for days. And then someday there is land. And so it is on the spiritual path. Sometimes you see nothing, you have no experiences, no consolations, but you are making the effort, even if it's just a little bit. And that simply means that the boat of your life, of your spiritual life, of your spiritual evolution is moving forward towards the shores of divine fulfillment.
Remember when you are going through a dry spell like that, that is the time when we have to learn patience. Because it is then when we start to really build and develop the spiritual qualities which are necessary to find God. If you give a child everything he wants, what is the result? He will be a spoiled brat, and he will not be able to cope with life. So it is on the spiritual path, exactly the same thing. We need these periods. This is necessary in order to develop those qualities. Patience [is the] first thing we have to learn. Patience, and endurance, perseverance, surrender to God, and unconditional love. These do not come if you are overwhelmed with gifts.
Are dry spells a natural and unavoidable part of one's sadhana? (Sadhana means spiritual discipline) Or are they brought on by some failure on the part of the devotee? Failure to maintain proper focus on God, failure to practice the presence of God, and so on. Both can be the causes. Dry spells.. everybody has them. Without exception, everybody has them. Now, they can come because if we become negligent, if we start skipping meditations and we let go whole days or maybe weeks even not practicing, not meditating. If we become lukewarm and we are just, you know, then naturally dry spell comes. Then there are dry spells. Even if a person keeps on practicing, the practice may not be very efficient, but he does the best he can. Dry spells may be coming, sometimes due to a karmic condition, sometimes directly as a test from God.
Swami Turiyananda said...
Swami Turiyananda, a monk in SRF, has said:
The only thing we have to do is to be willing to persevere, seeing nothing, feeling nothing, experiencing nothing, crucifying our ego by sitting in the chair [for meditation]. Each time you sit down in meditation and you attend your one hour, two hours, three hours of darkness and you are steady, getting nothing after one year, after five years, after ten years, after twenty years, after thirty years. That, my dear, will get you the goal.
In particular, the story of Milarepa, the great Buddhist Yogi, was very helpful. It gave me hope that things may improve with time. And of course, the lives of saints have always been very inspiring and useful on my spiritual journey.
Continuing with the meditation story...
I came to Yogananda's path in 2003. Since then, I have hungered for meditation, off and on. From 2013, I was meditating regularly. Since I took Kriya in Jan 2014, I became more dedicated towards meditation. I had taken the Kriya pledge of meditating regularly.
After many years of meditation troubles, eventually, one fine day, I felt a little peace. That was 19 Nov 2021. It was late at night, and we had returned from a birthday party of my bhanja (sister's son). I felt like meditating for a few minutes before sleeping. On rare occasions, I feel a slight peace in meditation, and then I start taking it more seriously for the next few days. Generally, that peace dies down. This time again, I meditated with more enthusiasm for the next few days, but this time, the peace grew. I was living alone in Gurgaon. My parents left the next day after attending the birthday party. I was working remotely for a startup. I was feeling deep peace doing Hong Sau meditation. I used to live for moments like these. Experiencing the divine was my only interest in life, but I had not felt any divine feelings for a long time.
God gave me a taste of the divine elixir in the form of peace. I became very excited and increased my meditation time further and further. All day long, even during work, I was thinking of meditation and how to improve it. I was taking 5 5-minute meditation break every 2 hours of work. That was the most fantabolous time I ever had. My happiness levels were great, not just because of meditative happiness and joy, but also because my desire of the lifetime was fulfilled. I was feeling great healing. I felt I got everything I wanted. The interesting thing is that I had not made any changes that would have helped in meditation. Even before that meditation phase started, I was the same. I used to do meditation daily, but with a lack of focus. Now I could focus.
The whole experience proved to me that it was God's will or my karma that stopped me from meditation. All longtime spiritual practitioners go through such phases, but in my case, these difficulties have been more.
I have gone ahead in the story. Let me come back to the time when I had just left Crypsis.
A SHIFT TOWARDS "HOW TO LIVE" EDUCATION OF CHILDREN & YOUTH, HYDERABAD [2014-2015]
I read several writings that explained Yogananda's vision of "How to Live" schools. Some of them were available in his autobiography. I looked for more details wherever I could.
During this phase, I also studied scientific proofs of spirituality, various Alternative Schools in India, the basics of Sanskrit in the context of the Gita, Gitapress's Bhagavad Gita, and more. I also studied a lot of Ayurveda from multiple books and podcasts.
I attended a spiritual retreat in Shimla. That was helpful.
At one time I was thinking of applying to join an impressive alternative school in Andhra (Peepal Grove), but I did not.
These are some science books I read during this phase. These were very helpful in understanding Einstein's theories & to an extent Quantum Physics also, and how these prove some of the core Spiritual concepts. For my own spiritual journey they were of no use. I had no need of science to prove spirituality to me. The experiences of love and joy were the greatest proofs.
I got first interested in this field of Einstein's theories and Quantum Physics, and how it proved some core concepts of Spirituality, while I lived at IIIT. I heard about the book "Tao of Physics" at that time from a PhD friend in a casual discussion in a mess. The name intrigued me, but I read it and the other books years later.
These books contain the original 700 verses of the Bhagavad Gita translated into English/Hindi. It helped me very much to understand the Original Gita. I also studied the Sanskrit of Gita from the book on the right. It is known as Gitapress Code 17 book. It gives word-to-word meanings for every sanskrit word. Both these are very small books.
I decided to visit Yogananda's Ranchi ashram for a few days but ended up staying there for much longer.
YOGANANDA'S ASHRAM & SCHOOL, RANCHI [2015-16]
In 2015, I moved to Yogananda's Ashram in Ranchi and I lived there for 11 months as a volunteer while working in their school (located in a distant remote area).
I met many monks and spiritual seekers in the ashram. Spiritual life in the ashram was very pleasing because of daily group meditations, bhajans, devotional events, and very positive and cheerful people to talk to.
My heart and mind became much more devotional. I used to feel like I was at home at last. My long-held desire to live in an ashram was fulfilled. I wanted to stay there forever or at least for a long time.
The school, about a 25-minute journey from the ashram, was a charitable school for the poor and was only for boys. I enjoyed interacting with the children.
I taught Computers to classes 9 and 10. I collected 100+ videos to build a subject-wise video library. I also took an interest in the books library and the science labs. I also worked on the development of an ERP for the school using Microsoft Access.
I met a few good educationalists who came to help at the school. I sky-dived into the field of education. I spent a lot of time studying Arvind Gupta's work and his science activity videos. My reading on David Horsburg's Neelbagh School, Gijubhai Badheka's Diwaswapan, and Mirambika School influenced me strongly. I also studied in detail the work of some top NGOs- Pratham and Teach for All.
It was during this phase that I took a serious interest in studying Functional Medicine (a field of alternative medicine).
For me, the main highlight of this phase was the devotional feeling I felt in the ashram. After years of spiritual dryness, the ashram stay was very refreshing.
Link to the FB post on IITian monks: https://www.facebook.com/aksheyjawa/posts/25985391797725963
AFTER THE ASHRAM, IN HYDERABAD & HISAR [2016-17]
I arrived in Hyderabad and stayed there for about 4-6 months.
The ideas that are now part of 'Spirituality on Mars' came to my mind for the first time during this time. But the term 'Spirituality on Mars' came much later. I did an extensive study on those ideas and studied what other people in India and abroad were doing that was similar to what I thought I should be doing.
I did a very extensive planning on what I would do and I typed all my plans & thoughts on my laptop.
Children and youth were the main focus but there were some critical projects for adults also. Example: There was a project to propagate spirituality among villagers (adults). This would require living with them and understanding them. Spreading true and sincere spirituality from village to village was thought about seriously.
More such projects on spirituality were planned that would impact all age groups. These projects have not yet been shared publicly on the internet, but they are still in plan.
I was constantly feeling that what I was thinking & planning was far-far beyond my capacity. I felt very small in comparison to those ideas.
(I also worked in a Yoga Studio for 1-2 months during this time)
Some events happened and circumstances changed a lot. I moved to Hisar. In the new environment, I gave a deep rethought to all the planning. I felt that I had made too big a plan. I felt a strong disbelief that I could do all that. I eventually rejected all those ideas from my mind. The thought of opening a school that originated a few years ago was still believable.
People insisted that I should do a B.Ed. because that is compulsory for becoming a teacher/principal. I realized it would be all about cramming and would take my time just for a degree, so I kept away from it. I wanted to know about pedagogy, educational psychology, and other areas covered in BEd. I read some of that on my own from some very good material available online at 'Teach for America' website. These documents are available here.
YOGANANDA PARENTING, GURGAON (REMOTE) [2017]
I was thinking about what best could I do for the spiritual education of children. I surely lacked the spiritual maturity to teach them, so opening a spiritual school was a far-out thought at that time. I started an initiative by the name 'Yogananda Parenting' thinking that it would help Yogananda's devotees in getting the resources needed to teach their own children.
The goal of Yogananda Parenting was to allow anyone interested in Spirituality, especially those who were interested in Yogananda’s Teachings, to bring up their children according to Yogananda's universal spiritual teachings.
Using attractive graphics and good UX, it presented Yogananda's teachings on parenting in short text-based content. It had an attractive website and social media presence. People liked it.
Getting back into Tech
Leaving the field of Child education
As time passed, I realized that my plan for working in the field of child education was not bearing much fruit. I had thought I would get some divine direction about what to do after Yogananda Parenting. I waited and waited, but got no direction. I thought, perhaps I was wrong. I thought, maybe, like the big plan of schools, colleges and other things, this plan was also my own imagination. I felt very disheartened and like a failure. I had spent years on the spiritual education of children because I thought that was what the divine wanted. I felt it was my misjudgment. (Years later, I kind of realized it was all a divine plan to push me in different directions. God's ways are often unpredictable.)
Going back to Tech/IT industry
I thought of going back to professional work. It was quite challenging to get a job again because of the long break of 4 years and changes in the technology ecosystem. I was applying as an experienced professional and my experience was primarily on the design side, and that too in CSS, UX and wireframing.
I was not applying for managerial roles
I wanted to work as an individual contributor only. I think jobs were available for managerial roles as well for my profile, but I was not applying for them.
I could not go for design work
I did not hold a degree in design and my experience in design was very specific. And CSS specialisation, the kind which I had, is anyways not much in demand in IT industry. They generally need simpler CSS work and mine was more specialised. And I did not know so much UX as a professional UX designer would know. I realised I was more of a jack of all trades but the tech/IT industry needs a master of some technologies which are in demand at that time.
And also, I was more interested in development work than design work. I strongly felt that I had made a wrong move by working in the design field. I had a strong development background which I did not use during the job.
I thought I would apply for developer's job now. That is what my education was and that is what I had done during most of my education. So I started looking for developer jobs.
Experience in college is different from that in a company
It makes sense for educational institutes to work in evergreen technologies but industries generally work in the latest technologies. It makes sense for industries to work in newer technologies because they want the best technology for the task at hand, even if it becomes outdated in a few years.
Many times, there is some upskilling required for applying what we learn in college, to get fluent with what works in industry.
For example: Experience in C/C++ is very helpful because it teaches us programming. But if we want to work in nodejs, it may be 80% same as C/C++, because most programming languages are similar to each other, but 20% more learning specific to nodejs and experience in nodejs may be required.
I could not apply for many programming jobs
I thought I would claim 1-2 years of industry experience in a programming technology, even though my experience was more in design.
During years of education, I was good in programming. But that programming experience was in C/C++, PHP/MySQL, Core Java, and system programming related. Most jobs are related to more fancy and newer technologies, like JavaScript, Java, Python, etc.
I could not show 1-2 years of professional experience in C/C++ and system programming because companies working in that area expected more applied knowledge in that field (using certain APIs, hardware tech, etc).
PHP/MySQL were less popular but that also required more database knowledge (architecture, optimisations, etc) and knowledge of those PHP features which one generally learns working in big projects in companies. Moreover, Databases was not among my strong subjects.
During college, people generally do not care about certain coding practices that people generally care more in companies. My experience in JavaScript was very limited in Crypsis. While I was in Crypsis, jQuery was popular and I had experience in that, not much in vanilla or object-oriented JS. But I think by this time jQuery had lost popularity.
React had become popular
Most jobs during this time were available in a new technology called React.js (developed by Facebook). React.js was unheard at the time when I was working in crypsis. But by this time React had replaced jQuery in popularity and demand. There was a high demand for react developers. Angular (from Google) was also in demand, but I felt React was better so I targeted that.
So if I had to apply for this tech, I had to learn it myself and claim an experience of 1-2 years in it. Sometimes when I study something, I get an interest in it and things become easy, but this did not happen with React. I had not done any major development since years and I was not getting much interest in react. I kept studying, gruelling and pushing myself to spend more and more time on React. I kept applying for jobs. In one of the failed interviews, the kind interviewer (from R systems Noida) suggested me to study from Maximilian's course on React. I did that. It is a famous udemy course on React. I was not getting a deep interest like I used to get in certain fields during years of education. Also, it required some rote learning for remembering the syntax of react.
I was appearing for interviews in big IT companies and in startups. I claimed to have 1-2 years experience in React but actually I had no practical experience. I had just memorized the syntax and understood the concepts. I could answer simple questions but when they checked practical knowledge, I could not answer. I had done some simple practise projects, but they did not help that much.
The biggest problem was that I was not getting much interest in the topic. But I did not find any other way to get a job, except to go after React (or JavaScript).
Did not apply to big Tech companies
Tech giants and Product Based Companies generally look for programming skills. I could have applied there, but Data Structures and Algorithms were not among my strong subjects. They focus a lot on that generally.
JavaScript (OOJS)
I was also trying to study Object Oriented JavaScript (OOJS). That also had some jobs, and JavaScript knowledge was anyways required for React jobs. In Crypsis, I did more jQuery, event binding, and basic JavaScript, not object-oriented JavaScript.
I was getting tensed because of not getting a job. Then I started an online Udemy course on JavaScript. I did get some interest in it and gained some OOJS knowledge.
Applied in NIIT
Soon after the JavaScript course, I applied for NIIT through a 3rd party company.
The interview went well. They were looking for a good JavaScript developer to work on 'Arctic' (explained in the NIIT section). Although React was not getting used in Arctic, but I was asked a few questions on that also. JavaScript was what they were using, and I was asked questions on that primarily. There was a coding round. I got selected. I was not getting paid much. The package was the same as what I was getting a few years back in Crypsis.
Soon after joining
The person who had taken my interview became friendly when I joined the team. He was the one who had started the programming on Arctic. He told me that my resume was more of a full-stack developer. After a few months, he left and I took his place in the team. From a technical point of view, my time in NIIT went quite well. Programming worked smoothly from my hands. Everyone around me seemed happy and I gained importance in the team. They knew Arctic was a challenging project and gradually things were getting implemented. I felt good that I was able to do good as a developer. Although it would have been better if things were more systematic, but that was not in my hands. But I think I did well as a developer.
In the beginning, I had some issues in the company, and I told one of the colleagues (the same guy who interviewed me) that I wanted to change. He said, no matter where you go you won't get such a good project. I have worked on many frontend projects, but they are not this complicated. Over the years, I realised that was true. Generally, frontend projects are CRUD-based and require creating and handling form-based content. That is usually simpler and repetitive. But Arctic was a great learning opportunity of a different kind.
Soon after joining NIIT, I got a new job in Sapient. But my manager and NIIT acted on the issues I was facing, and they were partially solved, so I stayed back.
NIIT, GURGAON [2019-20]
I WORKED ON THE DEVELOPMENT OF ARCTIC.
ARCTIC (name changed) is a platform similar to web-based Microsoft PowerPoint but oriented towards EdTech.
More details:
• Arctic is a web-based eLearning course-creation platform. I developed this along with a Backend developer and with a team of 5-6 junior Frontend developers.
• TECH USED: Vanilla Javascript, Riot.js & jQuery in the Frontend and MySQL & Node.js in the Backend
• Even though I was the team-lead but for the most part I worked as an individual contributor on the frontend. I partially worked on the backend also. During my last 5 months in NIIT, I was handling the backend myself completely.
• I think bringing Arctic to the point of release was seen as an Engineering Feat. I got Ace of The Quarter and Rising Star awards while working here.
• It was the most challenging programming project I ever worked on.
• It was primarily a frontend application, and I was the senior-most in the team on the frontend. All the architectural and development decisions for the front end were primarily taken by me.
• Arctic was mainly an MVP and was being run as a single-server application. At the end of my tenure, there were plans to shift it to the cloud.
• I used to train the users and teams within NIIT on Arctic, in groups and individually.
• Arctic was regularly demoed to NIIT's top management. My manager went to NIIT-Dublin, Ireland, to give 2 days of training on Arctic to a wide audience.
• I was heavily into recruitment & must have taken at least 80 tech interviews.
Personal Life during this phase:
My daily spiritual practice continued as usual.
KLEARNOW, HISAR (REMOTE) [2020-22]
Klearnow is a big product-based startup and it had a good deal of funding.
I primarily worked on single-page applications using Javascript/ES6, Reactjs, Redux, CSS, etc. I also worked on a library of frequently used components that could be used across multiple apps. I was also involved in unifying the design of the whole system. I was an individual contributor and was leading 3-4 newbie developers. I was also heavily involved in the interview process and must have taken at least 70-80 Tech interviews.
Personal Life during this phase
Spirituality continued as usual with daily meditations.
My parents, especially my mother, were quite helpful during times of sickness. They made a lot of sincere efforts to help me & took burdens.
But the politics in day-to-day life in the house has always been there and still continues.
Around Nov-Dec 2021, I got much more deeply into spirituality. For 2-3 months I had very good meditations. This was a very memorable phase of my life.
Job Change
Around the very start of 2022, I was applying to different companies for job. I got offers but did not join them.
This was a very spiritual phase. My spiritual longing was strong. In march end I left Klearnow with the thought of working for Yogananda's ashram remotely for a looong time. I had no thought of working with children.
SPIRITUALITY ON MARS [2022 ONWARDS]
During the end of KlearNow, I started going deeper into spirituality. That continued.
A few weeks after leaving KlearNow, the old plan of opening spiritual schools, colleges and other things, which I had thought about years earlier in Hyderabad, came to my mind very strongly again. For years I had completely ignored it thinking I was stupid to think so ultra-big. After Hyderabad, I worked at NIIT and Klearnow. During that phase, I doubt even a thought about all that ever came to my mind. When I had just joined NIIT, I had a slight bent towards the school idea but that also vanished after a while.
But one night in Hisar in Apr 2022, I had a small but strong experience and that very unexpectedly brought everything to the forefront again.
After Klearnow, I was strongly bent towards living a simpler life focused on sadhana, but soon I realized that it was not God's plan for me.
I resisted the new work a great deal! One of the many consoling thoughts that came to my mind was - "This work is your Sadhana". I understood that the Selfless service done by me as part of this work (along with regular meditation) would be critical for my further spiritual progress.
That night, after years I opened my 150+ page notes which I had carefully taken down on my laptop in Hyderabad in 2016.
All the projects I had planned in Hyderabad in 2016, are still in the current plan. Now I have done more research on them. But no plan has changed. To me, that means I was on the right track back then also.
I published the main plan of work on SpiritualityOnMars.com, which is about children and youth. That is the primary & central part of the whole work. I think this name occurred to me on Oct 21-22, 2022, because that is when I bought the domain name: SpiritualityOnMars.com
Spirituality on Mars (SoM) is a not-for-profit Spiritual + Tech initiative whose mission is to share Spirituality with Children & Youth.
Spiritual Education includes balanced development of an individual: Physical, Mental, Material, Social, and Spiritual.
Some of the focus areas of SoM are Meditation, Positive Thinking, Grit, Happiness skills, Spiritual Realization, Simplicity, Yoga, Love & Kindness, Devotion, Natural Living, Handling Emotions & Anger, Inner-Strength, Social & Emotional Learning, Perseverance, Will Power, Growth Mindset, Fearlessness, Cheerfulness, Stress Management, Physical Fitness, Sports, Discrimination, Calmness, Diet, Extra-curricular activities, Experiential Academics, Mental Toughness, Critical Thinking, and other Character Traits.
SoM also focusses on Life-Skills.
Starting from Dec 2021 to the year 2023, I noticed major changes in my personality. I have become much more happy, loving, confident, and social. It was more like a personality reversal. It all happened because of the spiritual experiences I had.
Currently (2024-25)
These days the following qualities are getting ingrained into my mind: Seva (service), Love for people, open-mindedness & seeing good in everyone, following divine will, simplicity, truthfulness, taking care of people and dealing with miscreants with calm but strong firmness & truth.
So far, I do not feel an inner sanction to share the lofty & eternal spiritual principles in my own words.
On rare occasions, I do write my thoughts on spirituality but that is more of an exception. Currently, I focus on many areas related to this work that do not involve teaching. Also, I notice that over time changes are happening in my character that are preparing me more for this work. After all, it is not about building a large setup and having a large follower count. It is about doing everything little by little in the way we know that God would approve. And surely he has a high standard! I think, God gives the highest importance to the PURITY of Seva one offers.
Yogananda docs on schooling and related topics
I collated the teachings of Yoganandaji on various topics.
I had been reading about Yogananda's views on education of children since years. I read from the autobiography, I read in old SRF magazines which were started by Him, I got some interesting documents from his followers and two books were released recently which described in detail how his school used to function in the olden days.
All these writings on school were scattered everywhere. I collated them in 2 documents. It makes this information much easier to find and read.
Also, I collated his wishes in a document related to how to run any spiritual initiative. Yoganandaji gave great emphasis on running his work not like a modern organisation, but with the honey of God's divinity. He said: "It is not my wish to develop a large, mechanical organization, but a hive filled with the spiritual honey of God."
I created another document that contain his wishes about the qualifications of a spiritual teacher.
All documents on the same lines:
Disclaimer: I have given a lot of importance to book reading in this whole document. So much book reading is not seen in a good light among spiritual people. Nor is it something that is needed. Sri Ramakrishna was illiterate. One of his prominent disciples, Latu, who attained a high degree of realisation, was also illiterate. In spirituality, applying what one has studied is of more importance. I have shared all kinds of books here because people in the world do give value to book reading.